In days of yore when I was with Hartley Morris, they did a totally disgusting parody of 'Pleasant and delightful'. Not so much a parody as a total devastation. I won't even begin to repeat it here. I dare say they weren't the only morris side to sing it either.

I love to sing the song, but every time I do I scan the room to ensure there are no off-duty morris men present! Even then I preface the song with the disclaimer that I am singing the CLEAN version, thank you very much. To make matters worse, as I sing it I can hear the wretched dirty version in my head!!! I'm sure one day it will slip out by mistake. Am I becoming paranoid?

As a result, I have started SROPAD – the Society for the Reclamation of Pleasant And Delightful. Membership is a trifling £100 per annum, cheques to me please.