You all have my sympathy. My brother's wife died three weeks after diagnosis leaving children aged three and four.

Hospice care is a good idea - the kids were terrified of hospitals because you went in and never came out. They thought the same would happen to them on a simple trip to casualty.

However old the children are, don't lie to them. Tell them what you think they will understand then give them time to digest it and ask questions and answer those as fully and honsetly as you are able to.

Build some photographic or other recorded memories of your ex while he is still relatively OK that they can look back on. However you parted, all bets are off now and you need to be amicable and talking from the kids' viewpoint. Their memories of these last few months will be irrevocably tarnished by acrimonious disputes. They may wish to provide input into funeral arrangements.

The most important person to look after in all of this is you, Mrrzy. You are the one who the kids will depend on, now and in the future. You need rest, support, someone to talk to, cuddles etc. to keep you on the straight and narrow to be there for them. Make time for yourself and don't feel guilty about it.