Well explained, Susan.

As I have mentioned in other threads, I use a wheelchair. Despite the American's with Disabilities Act, I find that there are places that I simply cannot go. These are usually private homes. Often it's flights of stairs up to the door or front porch. Frequently people invite me anyway and offer to lift me up the stairs, assuring me that they can do it, but generally I demur. I judge a situation where there are more than a couple of steps just too risky. So, I see them at other places. Bob Nelson (Deckman) has two steps up to his front porch. I couldn't make it on my own, but he lifts me and the wheelchair up and in (tips the chair with me in it back like a hand-truck and hauls me up a step at a time). At another house with a similar situation, the hostess's husky son usually does the deed.

Also, not all that many of my friends have bathrooms that are wheelchair friendly. In these cases, I prepare for the visit. Fortunately I have good bladder control, and on the day I will be visiting them, I drink fluids very sparingly, and by watching my fluid intake, I'm often good for six, seven hours or more. I read someplace that this is what members of the British Royal Family do when they'll have to be out all day reviewing parades and such. If the person with the disability uses his/her head, they can often figure ways around problems and obstacles.

It's my understanding that the ADA applies to public buildings and businesses, and that, as jeffp says, stipulates "reasonable" accommodations. Although, in a perfect world, it would be nice if every bathroom, public and private, were set up so they could be used by people with disabilities, this in itself could be a bit of a problem, considering the wide range of possible disabilities and the various unique needs they present. For example, the bathroom in my apartment is fairly small, but I had it set up so it's easy for me to use. I know other people in wheelchairs who would find it difficult or impossible to use.

GUEST, I don't know what sort of legal arrangements you have for your house concerts, but I would assume that since you are putting them on in your own private residence, the laws that apply to public buildings would not apply to you.

I don't know if this would help in case things get tight and you get a lot of static about operating a "public business" and not having an accessible bathroom, but I used to frequent a restaurant that was a gathering spot for various musicians, folk and jazz. Often there would be a jam session or a hootenanny on a Friday or Saturday night, and a few times, concerts. The restaurant owners didn't have the cabaret license required by the city to have entertainment in their establishment, so they simply placed the "CLOSED" sign in the window and left the door unlocked. They declared it a private party (with open an invitation). They didn't charge admission or cover, but there was a basket with a small sign suggesting that a contribution of a specific amount would be nice (I don't remember anyone not kicking in). Thus, the laws that applied to cabarets did not apply to them. They did this over a period of four or five years with no problems.

As much as I (obviously!) sympathize with this person's desire to take in your house concerts, it strikes me that they are not being entirely reasonable. I expect public buildings—which are designed to be public buildings—to be pretty accessible. But I am fully aware that there are events, often held in private homes, that I simply have to skip. There are places that I cannot go (would you believe Mt. Everest!??), so I just have to suck it up.

It ain't a poifeck woild.

Don Firth

P. S. Because of polio at the age of two, I've used crutches all my life, until I had to take to a wheelchair about fifteen years ago. I am not at all bothered by terms such as "handicapped" (which has an interesting history, not at all implying any disparagement) and "disabled." I find terms like "differently abled" clumsy, and for that matter, a bit patronizing. I wasa bit irked (but not "hurt") by a guy who used to refer to me as "gimpy," but then, it was common knowledge that he was a nitwit.