You may not think "your glib attempt...is what you are trying to do--but that's how it comes across--in spades.

Another benefit of religion--for a lot of people--perhaps not you--is that it helps them accept what otherwise would be crushing tragedy. If they believe there is a purpose to a death, un-knowable though that purpose might be-especially a death in their family-----it helps them accept it without going mad.

For a small example, check Tarheel's current thread.

It may not be your attitude--but please don't denigrate it.