An ecumenical archeological expedition in search of the common threads of all religion and concepts of God included representatives of several great faiths; a mullah, a priest a rabbi and a bhuddist monk. They tried to recruit a Hindu guru but he said he had already made that journey and was still sore so he refused to come along.
They toured and explored the legends, lore and cultures of the holy lands, the legendary regions of Shangri-La, the man made Islands of Micronesia and finally the great Amazon forest where not even geo positioning technology could trace their steps due to local powerful magnetic deposits.
Deep in the Amazon where caverns were said to stretch to the Pacific ocean deep beneath the Andes mountains they came across an ancient temple and were greeted by a remarkable Shaman who called himself Pooleyglot.
He claimed to understand the quest of the expedition and explained that all they seek is only a choice. "What kind of choice?" asked the Priest.
The Shaman said "It is always a choice between two things."
"What kind of things?" asked the Mullah.
"It is like a choice of life or death" said the Shaman.
"So you believe in an endless series of two choices" Queried the Rabbi.
"No, it is only two choices" said the Shaman.
"Can you offer any proof of your faith in two choices?" asked the Bhuddist.
"Yes. Yes I can." the Shaman exclaimed and as if with slight of hand presented the four religious leaders with a beverage.
"Drink and all shall be revealed!"
The Rabbi asked if there was any pork in it and the Mullah asked the same as well as alcohol.
The Shaman assured them it was an unfermented tea made soley from the tree of life.
They all drank deeply and turned simultaneously to view hundreds of natives that were assembling as if for a parade.
The four reassured themselves that they were in fact seeing the same spectacle. "WHO ARE THEY" asked the four in unison.

The Shaman boomed "They are the Aristocrats"
What do they want, What do they do, What are their beliefs? came the torrent of overlapping questions from the four men of faith as the archeologists and supporting film crew ran in the opposite direction.

The Shaman asnwered reassuringly "They are different beings to different people. Some may call them the embodiment of Karma and some may call them the livers of life, it is really a choice you must make.
NOW MAKE YOUR CHOICE !"

The priest said "What kind of choice?"

The Shaman said respectfully "You may choose the Aristocrats or death."
The beverage made the priest feel as if he had grown roots into the earth and could barely move, "I'll make no such choice"
The Shaman held a spear above his head and proclaimed "THEN I shal choose for you".
"NO NO no I will choose for myself and I shall choose Life as my God commands" said the Priest.
"Very well, then you have chosen the Aristocrats" shouted the Shaman so all could hear and a deafening cheer went up among the natives.

The four sat wide eyed as the natives led the Priest up to a familiar looking stone alter and stripped him of his clothes and laid prostrate upon the alter. Dozens of the Aristocrats proceeded to excrete great mounds of feces and rivers of urine upon the alter followed by many more who proceed to perform sexual acts upon the priest that defies description while others built a fire before the alter that could surely blister flesh, then rites of cruelty torture and pain began and did not end for six hours until the shattered but still alive remnant of the Priest's body was delivered back to the remaining three holy men.

When the Mullah was asked to choose he stoikly chose life and another six hours of manical acts ensued including sexual acts with yet different orifices such as an eye socket and transgressions of having to gaze upon cartoon images of Mohammed with one eye. Yet he too was delivered back alive to the group.

The Rabbi was hoping to argue his way out of the choice but in the end he too chose the Aristocrats and was defiled in ways never even imagined by Dr. Mengela. The experience seemed impossibly more extreme than his predecessors yet the Rabbi was returned with his external life intact.

The Shaman asked the remaining Bhuddist Monk to choose between The Aritocrats or Death.
The Bhuddist said " All of life is suffering. I already know suffering so I choose Death."

AHH said the Shaman, Very wise indeed. Then Death it shall be...
but first - THE ARISTOCRATS.