My Fellow MudCatteers;

No, it was nothing on the scale of, say, the Bay of Pigs, or even the Bloomer, Arkansas Fiasco of 1972, but a dreadful calamity has been averted by Bert!

I am thankful to Bert for his quick action in offering his word of Peace to the Crown of Mississippi. The Crown accepts it gladly.

But, all ye others, be forewarned...the Joe Offer Birthmonth is not a toy to be trifled with! It is a serious Statewide Celebratory Event and we shall not stand for any cowsplatter concerning it! We will act swiftly and vehemently!

I do hope yesterday was a very good day for Sir Joe Offer, First Duck of Pelahatchie. But August is his BIRTHMONTH!!!

Kk