The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #90332 Message #1711709
Posted By: Kweku
06-Apr-06 - 05:53 AM
Thread Name: BS: How do you define it?
Subject: RE: BS: How do you define it?
I am loving the contributions by everybody this shows that love has no single definition.
Aziz- years ago in Ghana,parents will search for love partners or life-long partner for their children.this is done to ensure that the child gets married to the right person and to the right family.because in Ghana if you marry from a particular family your spouse's family also becomes your family. after the parents believe that they have found the right person they approach the girl's family for the "knocking ceremony" .this is whereby they notify the girl's family about their son's interest in their daughter,the girl's family then accepts the drinks brought forward and then give time for the boy's family to come back for an answer.during this period the girl's family also investigate the boy's background to ensure that they are o.k with the family their daughter will be entering.after notifying the boy's family about their decision,the marriage rites begin in ernest or otherwise.
these days what has changed,is the fact that instead of the parents looking for the spouse,we the youth do that ourselves. so lets say if I want to get married,I will look out for a girl who can cook,clean and take care of the home.a strong woman to stand behind me all the time. we would date for some 3 months or more,after that I will introduce the girl to my family and the girl will do likewise.if both parents are satisfied, then we can go ahead with marriage preparations. one bad aspect of this method is that,since you want to be sure that the girl/boy is 100% o.k,you might want to have sex with the girl/boy to ensure that she is a woman/man and not some barren/impotent.though most youth will not admit this openly it is a factor because as they say "the sweetness of the pudding is in the eating". and this trial-and-error thing can go on for years and you might eventually end up with an S.T.D. sometimes I wished we could go bakc to the old times. but there are also people who marry virgins.
there are 3 types of marriage in Ghana; Customary-traditional marriage which allows you to marry more than one.
Christian marriage- of course this is the European style
Moslem- just like the one we know.
among my peers,monogamy is considered as the best, because of the high cost of living,Moslems also dread marrying more than one because there is a lot of "heart attacks" in polygamy. but a polgamous man is considered a "strong man" in Ghana. and these days in Ghana no matter the religion or upbringing most females in Ghana just hate polygamy,most have no reason for this.