The Choric Song of the Masturbators

Tune: "Finiculi Finicula"

Last night,
I pulled me pud;
It did me good,
I knew it would.
Sling it,
Fling it,
Throw it on the floor,
Smash it,
Crash it,
Catch it in the door,
Some people say that
Fuckin's might good,
But for personal enjoyment,
I'd rather pull me pud!

From THE BOOK OF BAWDY BALLADS edited by Count Palmiro Vucaron, circa 1960.

Charley Ignoble