Facing the matter squarely...

(by the way, I don't like my title for this, anybody got any suggestions?)

THE BOTCHER BOY 2.0

By Bob Coltman April 12, 2006

In New Orleans where did dwell,
To pull my pud I loved full well,
I pulled my pud both night and day,
Until my hand went far astray.

There is a place in yonders town
Where I have done it sitting down,
I've done it standing, and on my knee,
Even though bystanders criticize me.

It's grief to me, I'll tell you why,
Others have done it more than I,
But though I jerk, and let it fly,
My life will shortly go bye-bye.

He went upstairs to make his bed,
And not one word to his mother said,
His mother she went upstairs too,
Said, son, dear son, now aren't you through?

His father he came home from work,
Said where is Son, he's like clockwork,
He went upstairs, the door he broke,
He found the monkey had been choked.

He took a knife and cut it down,
And on his crotch this note he found,
Oh what a silly boy was I
To die of strangling my old snake-eye.

Go dig my grave both wide and deep,
Tie my hands so I can sleep,
And on my coffin a latex glove,
To show this world I died of love.