The Life Ov A Spunge!
Tuen-"Cappy's the Dog."

He'll start i' the morning before it's dayleet,
Not fit te be seen-he's a mis'rable seet;
When decent men's off on thor jorney te wark,
He's prowlin aboot like a thief I' the dark.

Korus
Then I' morning or neet,
I' the dark or dayleet,
Ye'll find ye'll de reet
Te keep clear ov a spunge!

He's drunk all his munny-small wages had he;
He'll tell ye he's hard-up wi' hevin a spree:
He'll beg for a jill, whingin oot, "Save me life!"
But nivvor exclaims, "Save me bairns an' me wife!"

He's selfish an' greedy, an' lazy as weel;
The slops an' the leavins he'll beg or he'll steal.
The glasses he'll drain if thor's nebody near;
An' guzzle up owt if it's only called Beer!

He'll laff twice as hearty as ye, if yor glad;
He'll shake his greet heed, if yor onyway sad:
His sympathy's welcum te ony one here,
If they'd only stand him a pennorth o' beer?

He's yor frind for a hapney: just give him one,
If they call ye Jack, he'll seun chrissin ye John!
He'll claim yor acquaintance wi' plenty o' cheek,
Like the thing that he is - a mean, back-bitin sneak!

I' dayleet or dark, iv his rags an' his dirt,
Keep clear o' the wretch,-cut his beggin quite short;
Nivvor once iv his company myek ony plunge,
Thor's nowt that deserves mair contempt then a spunge!

-Joe Wilson