Not a song for a song challenge, but I was reminded of this joke:

Paddy died in a fire and was burnt pretty badly so the morgue required someone to identify the body. His two best friends, Seamus and Sean, were sent for. Seamus went in first and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Seamus took a look at the body, said, "Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. It could be him. Roll him over". So the mortician rolled him over. Seamus looked down and said, "Nope, that ain't Paddy".

The mortician thought that was rather strange, and then he brought Sean in to identify the body. Sean took a look at the corpse and said, "Gee, he's burnt really bad. Will you roll him over?" The mortician rolled the body on to its front and Sean looked down for a moment before saying, "No, it isn't Paddy".

The mortician, puzzled, asked, "How can you tell?"

Sean replied, "Well, Paddy had two arseholes."

"What do you mean? No-one has two arseholes," said the mortician.

"Yup, everyone knew he had two arseholes. Every time we went into town, folks would say, "Here comes Paddy with the two arseholes!"