It's gotta be "nine inches". Gotta be. Those young idiots I was in school with year after dreadful year were obsessed with their stupid little dangly parts...most of which looked not too impressive when showering after gym class, that's for sure.

I could never fathom it. This obsession with their penis size that most guys have. Not then. Not now. A penis is like a nose or an elbow. Every guy has one (two in the case of elbows). If it works properly, then it's okay. Other than that, who really gives a damn?

I'd like to meet them all again just once so I could say, "Hey, guys? Get bent!"