Didja hear about the guy who went to the drugstore to get some condoms? The druggist asked, "What size?" and guy said he didn't know. "Well," said the druggist, "there's a wooden fence full of knotholes out back. Each knothole has a number over it. Go out there, stick your member through the holes and let me know the number of the one that fits."

So the guy goes out back. The druggist's lovely, nubile, daughter sees him and knows what he's going to do, so she runs down and arranges herself on the other side of the fence, moving from knothole to knothole as the guy moves.

Finally the guy staggers back into the drugstore. "Okay," says the druggist, "what size condoms do you want?"

"Condoms, hell!" whispers the man. "I want about a hundred yards of that fence!"