I thought that pikelets were crumpets that that look like they've had someone sit on them, so they're flat.

Muffins of course is where the American and English variety are totally different creatures - though "American Muffins" are in the shops all the time these days, and probably more common than Muffins proper.

Apart from "Let's call the whole thing off" ("you say tomato and I say tomato etc">/I> - the first time anyone ever read those lines they must have thought them very odd...) are there any other songs about this kind of thing?