Thank you. Lots of good thoughts there. The battle between the heart's longing and the logic of the (almost) inevitable is a difficult one. Picking up on what's been said so far, I did get the other person to see a counsellor for a series of sessions. The other person (I do keep trying to give nothing away, even the gender) came back with what turned out to be a pack of half-truths and just plain lies about what the counsellor had said - all admitted in the end. I know this makes my partner sound like a bad person, but this really isn't the case: just muddled and in need of help which I have tried - and, it seems, failed - to provide. In the end, I think, someone has to admit to themself that they're behaving irratically and strangely - imagining things that didn't happen, creating arguments out of that, trying to get out of a fast moving car, regularly disappearing for hours on end, hiding away and drinking until they're sick all over themselves, etc., etc. - but all that's painful to watch for their lover (me), and painful to hide from those who could be hurt by the knowledge. (Now you can see why this is anonymous.) You're right: life's short. Is it too short to waste time on this relationship? Or too short to give up on someone I fell head over heels in love with?