The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #92281   Message #1763302
Posted By: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
18-Jun-06 - 10:37 PM
Thread Name: BS: The Dum-Dum is for dumbasses!
Subject: RE: BS: The Dum-Dum is for dumbasses!
Hey, Rap-man, I run the show around here. Better believe it, Roscoe. I got four hands to handle deadly weapons, not just two like you pathetic humans, and I've handled every kind of deadly weapon there is. I can pick 'em off at long range too, and I have, but in downtown Chicago you don't get much of that unless you're a paid gunsel that does hits for the mobs, gunnin' down poor saps through lit windows from a tenth floor rooftop stakeout. I didn't figger you for that sort of lowlife, but maybe I was wrong. Nope, most of the shootin' I do is pretty close range stuff, and it's the guy with the steadiest nerve and the fastest reflexes that walks away when it's done.

I got my trainin' in the jungle, pal. Barehanded. Against gorillas, lions, leopards, snakes, and crazy-ass black tribesmen and dumbass white hunters who thought they was Jungle Jim or somethin'. I took 'em all one, and I have the scars to prove it.

Then I emigrated to the Big Apple and got more firsthand education on the dirty streets.

Then I went to the Windy City, and the rest is history. I took down Big Daddy Malone at the height of his power. I gave chimps a name in this town, so's they could hold their heads up when they walk down the street. I don't take second billing to no one. Specially not you, bub.

You are the first evidence I've seen that maybe some gorillas DO reincarnate as humans. The ones that couldn't make it as gorillas, I mean...