This is an interesting thread. I would never had thought about putting it to my Mudcat friends. I'm sort of in the other position. I'm 9 years older than Honey and it sometimes worries me. When I'm 59, almost 60, he'll only be 50 and a man at 50 may not want to be with a 60 year old woman. He'll still be able to find much younger women who will find him attractive. Now I know he loves me and we are getting married, but I wonder how it will be for him. I don't even know if I'm being fair. I can feel myself going downhill already. Bones ache, I can't bend over easily, I forget things, my eyesight is getting worse. Our love is strong and it would hurt him badly if I said we should not be together, but am I being fair?

As for you, Guest...well, since my separation from my 17 year old marriage, I've only gone out with younger men, but I've always had the sense not to take the relationship too seriously. Til now anyway. Hopefully you can love enough to get over the humps and there will be humps, and when she does get much older, I hope you don't leave her alone in what will be a very lonely world as it can be for older people. This is what you have to think about. Right now, at her age she can find someone her age or near to share old age with, but when she gets older and if you need something more than she can give you, she may not be able to find some to share old age with.

Another thought I've had is that I'll die and leave my Honey all alone. I'm worried about that too. His love is strong and because he's younger he hasn't seen mortality yet. I will most likely leave him alone when he's going to need me the most.

Just something to think about and consider. It will be taking a chance on both your sides. As much as we would like to think it does, love does not always conquer all.

If you decide to go on with what could be a very rewarding relationship, I hope all goes well, and I wish you lots of love.

Love, annap