The version transcribed from Priscilla Herdman looks correct to the best of my memory. I learned the song at least 16 years ago - may be 20 - to sing with a partner I've long lost touch with, and as a consequence haven't been performing it for a good few years. I don't remember it feeling 'trite' at the time. There were many songs that expressed similar sentiments but Paul Metser's one managed to say it's piece simply and memorably and the tune was a great vehicle for a real swell of chorus singing.