Hordes of bodhrans carrying human skinned drums have been spotted by an AA patrolman crossing Tidgy Lane (the bodhrans that is, the patrol man was sitting in his van having his scran at the time). "It fair made my hair stand on end" said shaven headed Wilbert Tonks (24) of Magpuss Grove, Upton Ogood. "There must have been 5 or 6 of them, making an unholy racket they were" added Mr Tonks.

Noted percussionologist Mary O'Bang (38 20 34) said she was nor surprised at the sighting as a number had been illegally released into the wild by activists and were obviously mating.