Your scurrilous remarks have been noted, madame, and although I am sure you meant them only as the kind of idle and witless gossip in which you are so well versed, and not as the malicious defamations which they will readily be interpreted to be in any court of law, I am obliged to advise you that they should cease forthwith, to avoid such a gruesome eventuality and its expensive sequelae.

With kindest regards,

James Benjamin Penworthy, Esquire

as advised by

Donaldson and Murray, Attorneys at Law
"If we bring you a suit, you won't find one of your own"
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