Well, I can't divulge my sources but I certainly wouldn't want to be in Gerald Ford's shoes (okay, slippers...) these days...

According to my sources, former President Ford is scheduled to die of "natural causes" three weeks before the election givin' the Repubs another 30 days of mourning where they will blow poor ol' Gerald up as the 2nd comin' of Jesus hisself...

Sorry, Gerald, but the party comes first...

But patented Karl... Good to see the boy still has it....