Well---group therapy. Azizi interpreted Guest's comments correctly according to Guest. All well and good. I can attest to the fact that these things are individual. Sometimes it is harder years later than in the early years. Reality sometimes takes time to realy sink in.

As to the discussion of "repasts" and "funerals". Truth is that it is a tradition --to my knowledge---in all faiths for food after the funeral (burial). Sort of a communal gathering to remember, reminisce, and, yes, small talk to make us comfortable.

I urge you to listen to a wonderful song by Kate Campbell---Funeral Food. It says it all. And truly describes it for all faiths---church basements (as was written on this thread), homes (Shiva), or restaurants when the people come from varied places---her song takes place in a southern home. The song fits all of the above.

Finally---Azizi wrote---"...healing does happen".   Sincerely, I am happy for him/her. Read my first paragraph and find that time does not heal all wounds---as the saying goes.

Hard as it is for me---I now refrain from an old joke and play on words

BH