1.I haven't figured out how to label myself!
2. Richard: I just realized that my original post went throug 2 times under Jew and Jewess! LOL
AND, Temptation is not necessarily sinful. I don't have the time, although I really enjoy this. As you may see from the times I post, it's costing me sleep! And I as you see, I'm enjoying this, so I've succumbed to the "temptation" again, depite myself!!
3. Bill: yes, there are 'fact[s]' that demonstrate that what I "believe" is actually true. I am by nature a skeptic, believe it or not. It's been about 15-20 years since I came to my own personal conviction of what is true. Ironically, it was difficult for me, because for unrelated emotional reasons, I do not trust my parents!!! When I referred you and others to other sites on the web, it is because there are modern day thinkers who can demonstrate this stuff scientifically and logically. I am currently practicing, based on that knowledge, and to tell you the truth, it has become a part of me. I don't remember all the specific "proofs", but my conclusions were based in reality. I now function based on what I researched then. It's kind of like when you have to add up prices in the supermarket to make sure you have enough money for your purchases, you don't revisit the concept of whether 2 plus 2 is 4!!!
There are many reasons why a person becomes a skeptic, or tries to find holes to exempt them from responsibility. Often the goal to dismiss the facts, is established before the analysis takes place. This would hardly be considered an unbiased inquiry! One cause for this is personal pain.
4.guestGrose, you are completely on target! I am quite aware of the connection between rampant assimilation, and the Holocaust. Throngs of young Jews discarded traditional Judaism in favor of all the other modern, and enticing "isms" that popped up all over Europe and beyond, in the 19th and early 20th Centuries. One example of these is communism! Additional examples of leaders who warned before the devastation, that the massive intent to "reform" Judaism, to make Jews less "different" would by necessity lead to a major "reaction" by G-d to set us straight were Rabbi Yisroel Meir Kagan, known as "the Chafetz Chaim" and Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman. Denial of this is wrong. Rebetzin Jungreis, and guestGrose's parents are pristine, heroic examples of people who suffered, yet don't hide from the truth. Thousands of survivors, branded for life by the Nazis with numerical tatoos, not only recognized that G-d had not forsaken them, but that He deemed it necessary. They bore the punishment with unmitigated faith that G-d was directly involved. And when it was over, they rebuilt broken lives, and never once considered that there service to G-d is meaningless.
"I chose not to bring this up, not because I am afraid of the truth, and want to tiptoe around it", because I was also taught, that there is no "answer to pain". In other words, it is "Ona'as Devorim" hurting through words, to respond to another's pain with "abstract truths" to quote Bill.
When a person asks "why", and they really mean "It hurts too much to bear", an answer is not what they need at that time. First they need compassion. No matter how deserving I may be of punishment, telling me why, while I am hurting so much, is callous, and may lead me to reject my relationship with G-d. These things are best taught BEFORE there is a calamity.
5.I address this to Russ: It is difficult for me to write this, because it triggers pain. As far as personal beliefs are concerned. I believe, personally, based on logic that I have considered (I scored 100% on my Algebra, Geometry, and Trig regents-not boasting, just giving a frame of reference to my logical capacities), that my personal struggles with intense illness and unremitting pain have a purpose. I continue to try to remember all of the benefits that I have already seen resulting from my situation (empathy, developement of a more personal relationship with G-d), as well as the principles of Judaism that ultimately I will see that this was for good. I will not see all of this in this world. Incidentally, my belief in a world to come, did not come as result of my pain and a desperate need to make sense of it. I am not superhuman. Despite all my knowledge and conviction, in the midst of excruciating circumstances, I certainly cried out "Why?". My Rav (personal Rabbi), who knows a whole lot more "answers" than I do, has never responded in the moment, to those cries with anything other than empathy. When it hurts, you cry. This is not a contradiction. I was crying out to G-d, Who can remove the pain but is not doing so. That is a personal statement.
6.As far as G-d "cluing us in":
The Holocaust did not happen in a day. The Neuremburg Laws, differentiating Jews from other German citizens, was certainly an opportunity to be "clued in". As much as Jews tried to melt into their host society, the Germans kept reminding us that we are different. Alas, many refused to see or hear.
And when the extermination began, no matter how assimilated a Jewish family was, Hitler did not care. His "solution" included those who were 3rd and 4th generation assimilated Jews.
And it is not that G-d only makes this clear to the "Rabbis". It is only that they make a greater effort not to suffer from "cognitive dissonance".