This thread don't carry no airheads, this thread
This thread don't carry no airheads, this thread!
This thread don't carry no air heads
Wear you hats, don't bring no bare heads,
This thread don't carry no airheads,
This thread.

This thread don't want no tumors, this thread
This thread don't want no tumors, this thread
This thread don't want no tumor
Pallid puns nor UK humour,
This thread don't want no tumor, this thread.

This thread don't run on speed, this thread
This thread don't run on speed, this thread.
This thread don't run on speed,
Quality BS is all she needs,
This thread don't run on speed, this thread.

Goody Two-shoes Coyote
Songs of the Shenandoah Shore
Urban Legend Publications, Boston, 1985