The fastest checker I ever saw was in a supermarket I used to go to before I moved. It was a man, and he was truly poetry in motion. I always chose him if he was there, even if his line was longer, because I knew he was twice as fast as anybody else and I would get through faster.

At the supermarket I go to now, there is a very fast guy, only he is even more amazing. He is obviously a previous head injury victim, and only has the use of one hand, but not only is he fast, he sometimes does little tricks tossing small items in the air and catching them as he goes. He is a joy to watch - always happy and joking too.

And Bert, I ALWAYS have my cash or card ready to pay when they ring up the amount.