Lads, lads, lads. Take it from a Canuck, the only 'real game' left is bear kissing. The rules are few and the game is simple.

1) Find a bear that is over one year old and weighs more than 400 pounds.

2) Sneak up on it.

3) Kiss the bear on any part of its anatomy, the one condition being that you must return to base with bear hair (called fur) in your teeth.

4) Get away from the bear you just kissed.

5) Accept copious amounts of beer from your admiring fans.

Golf, cricket, soccer, American football--anything but Canadian football pales in comparison.

Signed,

A Canuck

PS Our team started out with fifteen players and there are but four of us left. If anyone is interested in joining, call 555-600-1515. Applications now being accepted.