The only time that I can recall vividly that I was deliberately machiavellian with my children when they were small, was when my youngest daughter begged us to attend a fundamentalist Sunday school so that she could go to their Bible Camp with her best friend.

We said, "No problem!" and dropped her off every Sunday morning for 3 weeks, while my husband, myself and our other daughter went on the most child centred family adventures we could think of. At the end of three weeks she decided that the family fun she was missing seemed a lot more interesting than colouring purple Jesus's and she never showed an interest in Bible Camp again......thank God.