OK, for the purposes of this post I am not me, for obvious reasons. And of course Freemasonry is hardly very secret any more. And of course it differs in the USA.

However, while the collections for charity and all that sort of stuff are admirable, WTF is the point of the quasi-religious ceremony, the quasi-military marching about, the "Boy's own Paper" mysticism, the half-arsed symbolism, and the transparently imaginary historical mumbo-jumbo, not to mention the "Little Boys' Club, no girlies allowed" nonsense?

Does anyone really believe that there is a secret inner cabal that wields true power, when the big cheese in the UK is that buffoon Prince Michael of Kent? Most lodges seem to be full of taxi-drivers, the odd builder, plumbers and double-glazing salesmen, the occasional slum landlord, plus civil servants and failed teachers (hell, there's a concept).   

Does anyone really believe that it opens up vistas of secret opportunity for profit (I wish)?