Dear Santa,

I fear your elves have not arrived yet. I've put out two more shot glasses and straws, but the House Brownies are still singing two-part Everly Brothers, Blue Sky Boys, and even Fraser & Debolt harmonies for Chrissakes. Molly the Cat has been acting strangely of late, but her appetite has not diminished, so she might have been the one who drank the extra whiskey, but she doesn't seem to have harmed or eaten any elves.

I'm still eagerly awaiting their imminent arrival. Bring 'em on!