Who are "The Dickens," and why should we beat them? Or use them as a universal standard of measurement as in "Beats the Dickens out of me." Or are they evil spirits that possess our bodies, and have to be exorcised?

And what in the world is a doormouse? Do they work at mouse hotels? And why are they so quiet that we say "As quiet as a doormouse?" What do they know that they're refusing to talk about?

Our language is full of oddities that make no sense to me. Doesn't stop me from using them.

Now, where did I leave that left-handed monkey wrench?

Jerry