Best answer I heard/read is in "Operating Instructions" by Anne Lamott (I also heard her tell the story at a lecture). I don't know that a guy, or a chimp ; > ) could safely tell this to a woman he's involved with romantically, but a friend could. The story goes something like this:

Anne went shopping with her best friend to buy a dress for a first date. She tried on a dress and modeled it for her friend, saying, "Does this make my hips look too big?" or something of a similar ilk. Her best friend, who was undergoing chemo for breast cancer, had no hair left and was in a wheelchair replied, "Annie, you don't have TIME for this."