In Texas, anyone from another state or a far-flung place was probably from "Bumfuck Egypt."

Winters were/are "colder than a well-digger's belt buckle," or maybe "cold as a witch's tit," or possibly referred to a brass monkey's anatomy in various ways.

"Over yonder" was simply "a ways over there." Could also be "see yonder cow in that field?"

"Down the road a ways" meant a little farther on.

Might be "on you like a duck on a Junebug," or "like stink on sh*t."

And "Y'all come back, y'hear?" really does get used a lot there. More than one person is nearly always "y'all."

One I always liked was "If they stuffed your brain up a monkey's butt, it would still rattle like a BB in a freight car." (Usually yelled at my next oldest brother... as long as my mom wasn't around.)

In Washington state, place names lie in wait for the unwary all over. There are many Native American names for towns, such as Puyallup (PEW-allup, not POOEY-allup) or Sequim (took me years to figure out it was pronounced "Skwim," not SEE-quim).

Whoever refreshed this thread, thanks! And thanks to Katlaughing for starting it. It's been a fun one to read. And BTW, Missouri is not Missoura, it's Miz-ZUR-a!

Lin in Kansas