There's a big difference between telling a bunch of people about all the stupid things you've done in your time, and the occasions you've made a complete prat of yourself - and sitting there listening to someone else doing that.

There's a line between the kind of good-natured ribbing we all have to learn to accept, and bullying and cruelty. Quite where that line is drawn can vary - but you know when it's been crossed, whether thoughtlessly or intentionally. And it isn't just a question of whether the stories are actually funny or not. An anecdote about some personal humiliation which might actually be funny when told by the person to whom it happened could be like a blow to the face recounted by a third party.

It's no different really when it come to jokes or "jokes" about disability or race or whatever.