A few suggestions - assuming that some cast members are competent instrumentalists

"Man of constant sorrow" for David or Tony?
"D-i-v-o-r-c-e" for Ruth?
"Hate to the Wedding" for Adam
"Speed the plough" for Bert
"The disappointed coquette" for Emma
"The unfortunate rake" for Ed
"The maid behind the bar" for Jolene or "the drunken landlady"