The English invented *proper* beer. What more could you ask for? If it wasn't for the English, everyone would be drinking insipid urine-coloured rubbish. Proper European beers are nice enough, but not a patch on a decent pint of Theakstons or Spitfire.

Apologies to our American cousins who sadly have no option but to put up with insipid urine-coloured rubbish. Maybe the English should start a charity campaign. I can just see the TV spot now. Cue the Moonlight Sonata or something - picture of sad-eyed old American guy with a pint of flat Miller Lite - "Randy has never had a proper pint. He's never known what beer with flavour tastes like. But with your help, we can provide emergency barrel shipments. We can provide training and raw materials, so that no-one need suffer again in pubs across America. Won't you help us to stop this dreadful cruelty to Randy and others like him?" ;-)

Graham.

(OK, OK, yes I know there are great microbreweries across the US. I just wish there were better macrobreweries...)