Sorry to inform you, Raptor, but you probably ain't, ahhhh, techically "mentaly ill" so don't go thinkin' this is gonna get you oughtta work 'er nuthin' but...

...nice try...

But seriously, you may need both some grief counseling and some anxiety management...

Both are fields where there are lots of folks who have tools to get you thru what you've been going thru...

Good luck and keep in mind that there's at least one person here who has been thru it and come out the other side...

...me...

Bobert