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DOWN ON THE FUNNY FARM
(DeMille/Morabito)
As recorded by the Good Rockin' Daddies on "Born to Boogie," 1996. [You can hear it at Spotify.]

1. Down on the funny farm, the critters don't know
What to do or where to go.
They don't behave, but they mean no harm.
I'm gonna tell you 'bout the critters on the funny farm.

CHORUS: Hard times in the country, down on the funny farm.
Hard times in the country, down on the funny farm.

2. Down on the funny farm, the cows don't "Moo."
They sing like a rooster: "Cock-a-doodle-do."
Early in the mornin' they're perched on the barn.
They think it's their job just to wake up the farm. CHORUS

3. Down on the funny farm, the rooster don't crow.
He's not on the fence; he's down below,
Tryin' to give milk when the farmer comes past.
Spends his whole day just chewin' up the grass. CHORUS

4. Now the horse is out back; he's buryin' a bone.
The mailman's glad he's leavin' him alone.
Throw the horse a stick, he'll chase it real far.
He spends his whole day just chasin' down the cars. CHORUS

5. Now the doggie don't bark like he used to do.
He whinnies all day and half the night, too.
He likes to pull a plow and wear a saddle on his back.
He spends his whole day just racin' 'round the track. CHORUS

6. Down on the funny farm, the farmer is tense.
He can't pitch hay or mend up a fence.
His animal friends are gettin' him down.
He's gonna sell the whole farm and move into town. CHORUS