"Christmas Carols For The Psychiatrically Challenged"

SCHIZOPHRENIA: "Do you hear what I hear?"

MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER: "We three
kings are all the same person!"

DEMENTIA: "I think I'll be home for Christmas."

NARCISSISTIC: "Hark, the herald angels sing about me."

MANIC: "Deck the halls and walls and house and lawn
and streets and stores and office and town and cars
and buses and trucks and trees and fire hydrants and ..."

PARANOID: "Santa Claus is coming to get me."

PERSONALITY DISORDER: "You better watch out, I'm
gonna cry, I'm gonna pout, maybe I'll tell you why."

DEPRESSION:   "Silent night, holy night--all is hectic,
all is dark."

OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE: "Jingle bell, jingle bell,
jingle bell rock, jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock,
jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock, jingle bell, jingle
bell, jingle bell rock, .."

PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE: "On the first day of Christmas
my true love gave to me... (and then took it all away.)"

Dave Oesterreich