As might be imagined, BBC's "Top Gear" team had some harsh things to say about speed cameras. They reckoned that the death rate on the roads had not fallen by any statistically detectable amount, while the fines collected from speeding drivers snapped by Mr. Gatso (a well-known brand of camera) had increased fourfold. They therefore concluded that the stated reason for their deployment was nonsense.

I believe that the Institute of Advanced Drivers concluded (from what source or reasoning, I don't know) that speed cameras had saved perhaps 20 lives. On the other hand a judge in Birmingham wondered whether they hadn't actually caused some accidents (passing judgement on two motorists convicted of driving without due care and attention, through gazing upwards looking for the camera rather than at the sharply decelerating cars in front of them).

Other instances where I believe the authorities have had to backtrack on ill-advised "safety" measures, were a yellow grid (which drivers may not enter unless they can exit it, designed to prevent traffic jams at junctions), in London which was so huge that nobody could legally enter it. A driver who had sat for ten minutes waiting for a clear exit was told by a PC to move or he would be charged with obstruction, entered and was promptly snapped by an enforcement camera.

Incidentally, I should add to my list of driving offences which should be made detectable by camera:

- cutting right-hand bends (far, far too common in my experience);
- driving while under the influence of peroxide;
- driving in the manner of Starsky and Hutch, with pounding adrenaline-charged seventies rock music on the cassette player.

****

"Excuse me miss. Would you mind blowing into this bag?"
"Of course not, officer, but why? I wasn't breaking any speed limits."
"No miss, but I want to cool my chips down."

****

"Excuse me madam, but you were exceeding the speed limit back there."
"But officer, I thought you never arrested pretty women motorists."
"Correct, madam. You do not have to say anything unless you wish to do so, but anything you do say ..."