What a relief for you that you have your son home again and safe. It sounds as if you have got things just a little on track right now.

One of the other things I learned from the training sessions I had was that, when things calm down the abusive partner can be very good at using whatever tactics necessary to get back into the relationship. The use of contrition toward the abused partner is very well known and the cry of "It won't happen again" may soften the resolve.

Problem is, it will happen again and the behaviour is not going to change. In your case your partner has been through the Domestic Violence programme and it didn't stick. He has used drink and drugs for many years. The likelihood is that he will continue to behave in a way that is bad for you and your son. Because of the way in which abusers manipulate their victims it may be difficult for you to resist his pleadings. Just remember that his situation is of his own making, for whatever reason, and that you CANNOT change him. Whatever happens to him from now on is down to him. He is the only person who can change his life and move on but he won't if you let him back into your life.

Now that your son is fully aware of the problem your best course of action is to make sure that the rest of his childhood is as safe and secure as you can make it and to break the chain that might continue into the next generation if he was to accept his home life as the norm.

There are people here who have done this - it isn't easy and you will need all the support you can find, as will your son. At some point family counselling may be of use and I'm sure that the Domestic Violence Counsellor at the Sheriffs office would be able to point you in the right direction.

Good luck and give your son a hug from me.