The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #59418   Message #1928168
Posted By: Rapparee
06-Jan-07 - 09:16 AM
Thread Name: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads

There's been an interesting development. The police are putting a substation in an old store just a couple blocks from the Legion Hovel.

It's not exactly an old store. It's actually an old, an old, well, an old whorehouse and opium den that was closed during The Great Vice Raids that followed the closing of the Air Base here after WW2. (Couldn't very well close them up DURING the War, could we? I mean, where would the boys 'n' girls have gone for off-duty recreation?) Anyway, the cops are turning it into a full-time, staffed, police substation and the folks in the Legion are quite happy about it.

They've complained over and over to the police about the noisy neighbors. Harassing telephone calls at all hours, awakening the drunks and threatening all sorts of physical violence just because the Glee Club is practicing "Roll Me Over In The Clover." People yelling about the friendly little wrasslin' matches which end in good comradeship and only a few broken bones and rarely any blood to speak of. And the Legion deals with those who might get so excited as to shoot out the lights or something -- everyone have to check ALL of their guns at the door and have had to do so for more'n ten years now, ever since that unfortunate incident where Clean Ike thought that Dirty Ike was wearing his (Clean's) hat and shot it off his (Dirty's) head only to find that he (Clean) was looking at his reflection in the mirror behind the bar and the ricchet off the mirror danged near put a bullet hole in the Memorial Portrait Of Naked Nellie, Man's Best Friend And A Pal To Women Too.

Anyway, the Legion has sent a thank-you note to the Chief of Police and has asked that the near-daily processions with torches and pitchforks by the neighbors be stopped because the carrying of nooses is severly disturbing to several of the Legion members, reminding them of Certain Things they'd rather forget.

We'll see.