all right, it's time for a bit of straight talking here. About the Folk Mafia I mean. Like most organisations, we have both gentlemen and players. The guys with the Daily Star are members (just), but not full members if you know what I mean. They play good quality fretted instruments (so you were wrong, Mr Red) and sing Ewan McColl stuff. We, the creme de la creme as it were, sing only Child ballads and give guidance to our footsoldiers, who see to the wet jobs. You'd be truly honoured if our Guardian squad stooped to do you over.   

As for the nom de plumes, keep worrying. Our people have infiltrated all the organs of goverment communications intelligence. Have a good look round next time you're at a session in Cheltenham. We've got your number.....