More old Two Ronnies news items:

A pickpocket was chased out of Battersea Funfair today and ran into the Post Office Tower. Police immediately threw a ring around it - and the Postmaster General gave them a goldfish.

A man who threw his mother-in-law into the crocodile pool at Bellevue Zoo has been prosecuted by the RSPCA.

And a man was detained at Savile Row police station after an incident involving a topless model in an Oxford Street store window. He was arrested and later charged with a smash and two grabs.

Finally, during the University Boat Race, a drunk and disorderly Cambridge fan who urinated from the Hammersmith Bridge while the Oxford crew were passing underneath, was accused of having one over the eight.