1. Legal counsel is in the works.
2. She has been pointed in the direction of someone who knows the system more than myself and can advise her what to do.
3. Counseling appointment already made for her and the children.
4. I tried to get her to phone her Dr. for some medical help. This is not the only thing on her plate. Her father figure was just re-diagnosed with cancer after a remission, she has to have surgery next month, she has other children who are delayed and receiving therapy, a 16 year old daughter who injured herself and now has physical therapy 20 miles from home, twice a week, her mother figure just returned home from the hospital, she works 2 jobs, tries to help her adopted family at every turn and is doing what she feels is best for her children. Let's add to this pile that she recently has gone through a miserable break-up (not the dad of the boy who's custody is in question). She needs help. I know I can't give it to her. I have been at her home and we've laughed over other things but this last piece, the custody papers this morning, were the icing on the cake for her. I am not looking for legal advice (Capt. Ginger) but rather for information about how I can help my friend from drowning. Legal advice is forth-coming. My understanding is that the two parents will meet in a mediation meeting and try to come to some type of compromise. If a compromise can't be reached, then they will have to go to court, a specialized trial of sorts where witnesses are allowed to speak as well as the parents and children.

She has asked me to come drink with her on more than one occassion after a bitch session and I continue to tell her that drinking won't do any good. I tell her I'll come over but the wine needs to stay corked and that's what happens. I'm clear with her when I don't know and have encouraged her to seek professional advice (which it looks like she has started).

I hate to see her hurt so much, HATE IT. As with any custody battle, there is more to it but you have the basics. I'll try what Susan said, I've been trying to get her to focus on other things but its not as easy as it sounds.