I'm sure we're all relieved to hear about your toilet moments Captain. I'm glad theres still someone out there who doesn't let it all hang out, so to speak.

Of course I agree, whilst we all enjoy a good shit and its fun to sit around the campfire telling tales of the great shits we've had, singing songs and celebrating that moment of parturition. Breathes there a soul so dull, I ask myself, whose heart does not leap in enchantment in that magic of the plop.

A degree of restraint is called for, otherwise its just an orgy. An essentially private time, and you are right not to share it with anybody.