Tami, perhaps this poem by Robinson Jeffers will give you some comfort. Bob

THE HOUSE DOG'S GRAVE (Robinson Jeffers)

I'VE CHANGED MY WAYS A LITTLE: I CANNOT NOW
RUN WITH YOU IN THE EVENINGS ALONG THE SHORE,
EXCEPT IN A KIND OF DREM: AND YOU, IF YOU DREAM A MOMENT,
YOU SEE ME THERE.

SO LEAVE AWHILE THE PAW-MARKS ON THE FRONT DOOR,
WHERE I USED TO SCRATCH TO GO OUT OR IN,
AND YOU'D SOON OPEN: LEAVE ON THE KITCHEN FLOOR
THE MARKS OF MY DRINKING PAN.

I CANNOT LIE BY YOUR FIRE AS I USED TO DO
ON THE WARM STONE,
NOR AT THE FOOt OF YOUR BED: ALL THE NIGHT THROUGH
I LIE ALONE.

BUT YOUR KIND THOUGHT HAS LAID ME LESS THAN SIX FEET
OUTSIDE YOUR WINDOW WHERE FIRELIGHT SO OFTEN PLAYS,
AND WHERE YOU SIT TO READ - AND I FEAR OFTEN GRIEVING FOR ME-
EVERY NIGHT YOUR LAMPLIGHT LIES ON MY PLACE.

YOU, MAN AND WOMAN, LIVE SO LONG, IT IS HARD
TO THINK OF YOU EVER DYING
A LITTLE DOG WOULD GET TIRED, LIVING SO LONG.
I HOPE THAT WHEN YOU ARE LYING

UNDER THE GROUND LIKE, ME YOUR LIVES WILL APPEAR
AS GOOD AND JOYFULL AS MINE.
NO, DEAR, THAT'S TOO MUCH TO HOPE: YOU ARE NOT SO WELL CARED FOR
AS I HAVE BEEN.

AND NEVER HAVE KNOWN THE PASSIONATE UNDIVIDED
FIDELITIES THAT I KNEW.
YOUR MINDS ARE PERHAPS TOO ACTIVE, TOO MANY SIDED,
BUT TO ME THEY WERE TRUE.

YOU WERE NEVER MASTERS, BUT FRIENDS. I WAS YOUR FRIEND.
I LOVED YOU WELL, AND WAS LOVED. DEEP LOVE UNDURES
TO THE END AND FAR PAST THE END. IF THIS IS THE END,
I AM NOT LONELY. I AM NOT AFRAID. I AM STILL YOURS.

Robinson Jeffers 1941