Hydrophobie

As Skipper Carr an' Markie Dunn
Was gannin', drunk, thro' Sandgate,
A dog bit Mark, an' off did run,
But sair the poor sowl fand it.
The skipper, in a voice see rough,
Aw's warn'd, says he, it's mad eneugh;
Howay, an' get som Doctor's stuff
For fear of Hydrophobie!

The Doctor dresse'd the wound se wide,
And left poor Markie smartin';
Then, for a joke, towld Carr, aside,
Mark wad gan mad, for sartin'.
Noo, Skipper, mind, when in yor keel,
Be sure 'at ye watch Markie weel,
If he begins to bark an'squeel,
Depend--It's Hydrophobie.

For Shilds next day they sail'd wi' coal,
An' tyeuk aboard a Quaker
Who wish'd to go as far's Dent's Hole,
To see a friend call'd Baker.
The Skipper whisper'd in his ear,
Wor Markie will gan mad, aw fear!
He'll bite us a'--sure as yo'r here,
We'll get the Hydrophobie!

Said Quake, I hope this can't be true,
Nay, friend, thou art mistaken;
We must not fear what man can do--
Wea! I will stand unshaken.
The Skipper, to complete the fun
Then told the Quaker what'd been done--
(A dog'd bit Mark an'off did run}
An' browt on Hydrophobie.

Now Markie overheard their talk,
Thinks he--aw'll try the Quaker--
Makes Pee-dee to the huddock walk,
Of fun to be partaker.
To howl and bark he wasn't slack,
The quaker o'erboard in a crack,
Wi' the fat Skipper on his back
For fear of Hydrophobie.

Now Pee-dee laugh'd to see the two,
Who, to be saved, were striving;
Mark haul'd them oot, with much ado,
An' call'd them culls for diving.
The Quaker seun was put ashore,
For he was frighten'd very sore;
The Skipper promis'd never more
To mention Hydrophobie!

-by Robert Emery; to the tune "The Cameronian's Rant," or "X.Y.Z."., Source A Beuk o' Newcassel Sangs.