The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #99152   Message #1973458
Posted By: Scrump
20-Feb-07 - 06:33 AM
Thread Name: Absurdities in songs - any examples?
Subject: Lyr Add: IT'S IN THE BOOK (Johnny Standley)
All this analysis of song lyrics and finding fault with them reminds me of "It's In The Book" by Johnny Standley (1952). He recorded this sketch as a preacher giving a sermon about "Little Bo Peep". Here are the first part of the lyrics I found on the web:

I have a message for you - a very sad message!
My subject for this evening will be Little Bo Peep.
It says here, "Little Bo Peep, who was a little girl, has lost her sheep, And doesn't know where to find them."
Now that's reasonable, isn't it?
It's, it's reasonable to assume, if Little Bo Peep had lost her sheep,
It's only natural that she wouldn't know where to find them.
That, that basically is reasonable, but, uh, "leave them alone".
Now that overwhelms me, completely overwhelms me.
The man said she lost her sheep, turns right around and boldly states,
"She doesn't know where to find them".
And then has the stupid audacity to say, "Leave them alone"!
Now! Now, now think for a moment! Think!
If the sheep were lost, and you couldn't find them,
You'd have to leave them alone, wouldn't you?
So, "Leave them alone". "Leave them alone".
It's in the book!

"Leave them alone and they", they being the sheep, "they will come
home".
Ah yes, they'll come home.
Oh, there'll be a brighter day tomorrow, they will come home!
It's in the book.

"They will come home… a-waggin' their tails…".
Pray tell me what else could they wag?
"They will come home a-waggin' their tales … behind them… behind
them"!
Did we think they'd wag them in front of them?
Of course, they might have come home in reverse.
They could have done that, I really don't know.
But, none the less, it's in the book.

(It's the way he tells 'em! It's a lot funnier to listen to than it is on the printed page. Anyone else remember it?)