Sir,

The pomposity of your posting has confirmed your bombastic nature and lack of regard for Truth. It grieves me full sore, and I would overlook the insult to myself, but I cannot countenance the insult to my family. I ask that you explain yourself and provide any mitigating circumstances (for example, gross intoxication) for these crude, malicious, and untrue remarks.

I remain, Sir,

Your servant,
Rapaire