Y'all might run into a problem there...............

For many years, the Bob Evans Farms Sausage Company would have a field day open to the public on their actual farm down in Rio Grande, Ohio. One of the many events they had was a chicken flying contest. The chickens were in mail boxes 4 foot off the ground and you had to yell or poke at or generally aggravate the chicken until he left the box on her "flight" and they measured the distance. This actually went on for a number of years until the inevitable happened.

A big doofus of a redneck hilljack walked up to his chicken in the mailbox and from somewhere in his bibs produced a ball bat. With a mighty swing before anyone could do anything to stop it, Bubba slammed the back of the mailbox. Amidst a cacophony of "BBRRUUUUCCCKKK" sounds and a small cloud of feathers the chicken was launched into deep right.........and ended any further chicken flying both then and for all time in the future.

I would write this off as legend but embarassingly enough, I was there.

Spaw